1/2 the Salad, 3/4 the Price

What is half of ten? Five, right? Is that so hard to figure out? It's pretty simple if you ask me, but at some restaurants half of ten is like eight or something, and half of twelve is sometimes like nine or so. Confusing, huh? One of my biggest pet peeves involves this simple math.

Half of a salad should cost half of the price! Anytime I see whole or half salads on a menu at a restaurant, I become enraged at the price discrepancy between the two.

I realize that the server still has to get paid their same wage whether I order a full or half salad, and their time is valuable, and their wage is some of that additional cost, but I feel like that is up to the restaurant to make up for. Restaurants don't charge for water, but that is just as time consuming to refill as a soda they make three bucks on. And restaurants that have half-priced happy hour appetizers somehow manage to stay afloat even though they are serving the same thing but only making half as much. And if their argument is that it's more than half a salad, so that's why it's more than half the price, then don't call it a half salad. Simple as that. Call it "A Little Less" or some other kitschy name.

The problem is, I can't really eat a whole salad without stuffing myself until lettuce climbs its way back up my esophagus. But that being said, I will always, ALWAYS, order the whole salad when dining out, unless I deem the half salad price to be comparable to that of the whole salad price. The way I see it, I would rather throw half of the salad away, and burn two or three dollars, than get a half salad. I know they don't care, but I feel like I am sticking it to the restaurant by getting this whole big salad and throwing the rest of it away.

And then I win.

Top 5 Cleaning Products

As if it wasn’t obvious, I have a top 5 list of my favorite cleaning products. This is my OCD-ness at the best, and I would recommend any of these products for various reasons. Now these products are all for different things, so this is not in any particular order, but let my explanations speak for themselves.

5. Clorox Wipes – As mentioned in my previous post about bathroom cleanliness, I am totally a fan of these puppies. I keep a container of them in my desk (I work at a hospital) and at various times during the day, I whip them out and let them do their business. They are convenient to use and kill 99.9% if all bacteria. They are pleasantly scented (lemon, orange, or fresh scent) and stay moist and ready to use whenever needed.
PRO: Quick peace of mind. Lemon scent smells so clean!
CON: They take a little too long to dry, and because they don’t smell like alcohol, I find myself doubting the fact that they really work on the truly gnarly, invisible killers.
BEST USE: Cleaning places that aren’t dirty, but may be unclean. (Think counter top post raw chicken preparation.)

4. KaBoom – Cleaning showers is a pain in the ass but for hard-water spots, and dirty foot prints on the base of the tub, this is the product I turn to (thanks J!). Leave it on the sliding glass doors for 5-10 minutes and come back and clean it. I would recommend the small circles technique of scrubbing it off because I find it works the best. Don’t get me wrong, you are still going to have to use a little elbow grease but I feel like this gets the job done.
PRO: It’s very thick, so when you spray it on the desired surface, it stays where it’s sprayed.
CON: It’s yellow. I feel like cleaning products should be clear or white, but it still works so I can get over it. Also, the scent is very potent, and you are going to have to take a breather if you are cleaning the whole shower.
BEST USE: Water spots on the shower door. (Scrubbing required.)

3. Swiffer – Um amazing. When these bad boys burst upon the scene (it feels like it wasn’t that long ago, but I don’t really remember) I was skeptical of their cleaning ability, but they are now one of my favorites. I like the fact that hair sticks to them, and they seem to get dust that I didn’t know was there. If you haven’t used these yet, get out from under your rock and use them. They come in wet and dry versions, and they are so much more sanitary then a mop (a stinky, moldy, bacteria spreader) or a broom (are you kidding me they run right over most of the dirt they are intended to catch). Being a little bit of a tight wad, I will use one Swiffer cloth for the whole house, and vacuum off the hair and dirt intermittently until the job is done.
PRO: They are literally like dust magnets, and can be reused until the job is done.
CON: Obviously they are not a one time purchase like a broom is, and because of that, they are more expensive…but it is money well spent. One thing I will say about that though, I have found no difference between Swiffer and store brand so if you want to save some green, you don’t have to buy the Swiffer name.
BEST USE: Hardwood floors. If you want them to feel clean on your bare feet, use a Swiffer.

2. Mr. Clean Magic Eraser – These are relatively new too. I’m not sure how they do what they do…but they are pretty magical. They clean scuff marks pretty well, mold on shower tiles (in the grout especially) and then pretty much anything else you can think of. I believe the “magic ingredient” is some sort of paint thinner, so be careful. If you use it on a painted wall, and scrub too hard, it will pretty much take the paint right off. Another downfall is that they disintegrate in your hands and drip white cleaning agent all over the place. A small price to pay, if you ask me, but annoying none the less.
PRO: They clean things that are really difficult to clean otherwise. Especially the bathroom.
CON: They are too powerful? (Sounds strange but I’m sticking to it.) And they fall apart in your hand (store brand more than Mr. Clean's brand.)
BEST USE: Bathroom tile grout. It’s a safe haven for mold, but Mr. Clean found a way to flush it out.

1. Goo Gone – Holy Crap, where has this stuff been all my life? I can't say enough good things about this amazing cleaning accessory. It manages to get the stickiest messes out with little to no effort. Tree sap, gum, 15 year old stickers…nothing is a problem for Goo Gone. Recently I cleaned off three, 15 year old parking stickers from my grandmother's old car. It took a lot of rubbing but they are gone with no residue left on it, and no scratches on my windshield. I look at it everyday and smile. It’s simply amazing. It has a pleasant citrus scent, (which as I said before, just smells clean) and you do not have to use large quantities in order for it to get the job done. A little goes a long, long way.
PRO: It can clean things that you have given up on ever getting clean, but please read the directions before you put it on something that gets ruined.
CON: (If you find one, let me know. But I will say that breathing it in an enclosed car made for a dizzying experience. I can’t hold that against the product though, so no CON)
BEST USE: Tree sap on you car. It cleans it off effortlessly.

So that's just a little glimpse of my passion. Stay tuned for my bottom 5 cleaning products coming soon! :)

Manhole covers

So you're probably thinking "what could possibly bother you about manhole covers?" but this is definitely an OCD thing that drives me bonkers!

I know you have all seen the manhole covers that sit atop the street entrance of a sewer...well I have this thing where I can't stand it when they are put back over the sewer holes incorrectly. Now I know there is no "wrong" way to put a round piece of metal over a round hole, but I really wish there was some sort of indicator as to where it should be placed when the hole is recovered.

Oh wait there is...

Now it's not all of them, but sometimes the paint on the streets will overlap with a manhole cover and act as that indicator. But, instead of putting the cover back on the hole so that the lines of the road will match up again, the non-OCD mind (or maybe in a hurry to get home?) just puts it back wherever it falls, and there it sits, taunting me to no end.

Seriously, how crappy does that look, and how easy would it be to fix this! I know these Bs are heavy but if they were put on correctly the first time, it would be easy!

Beards

As a huge, bearded biker sputtered past me on the freeway, I was reminded about my strong feelings for beards. I don't not like beards, but in my opinion it has to be well-kept, clean, and natural. I don't understand the appeal of growing a long, wiry, pubic beard. It looks gross and I don't care what everyone says, you are instantly judged the second someone sees it. Most often, the long beard wearers have grey beard hair...only it's not grey. Instead it's some tobacco stained, yellow color that cannot be cleaned with the harshest chemicals known to man, and that, coupled with the wiry factor, create the perfect storm of yuck. Picture yourself as a toddler climbing up to see Santa Claus and seeing this guy looking all dirty (regardless of whether or not he is actually dirty) staring down at you? It's no wonder children cry at the sight of Santa.

So that covers what I mean by well-kept and clean, but what do I mean by natural? Well, everyone has seen the guy walking around the mall, or the baseball park looking like he has a piece of black tape as a beard. The beard with no changes in color or texture, no highlights, no hints of grey (if it's age appropriate) just straight, jet black, obviously dyed hair. I blame the company Just for Men. They have brainwashed viewers into thinking dyed hair looks good with the catchy jingle "It looks so natural. No one can tell, with Just for Men." I contend that their jingle should be "It looks so fake. Everyone can tell, it's Just for Men."

Single Occupancy Public Restroom

I don't know about you, but single-person, public restrooms are a heap of anxiety for me. Not because I wont use them, but because I tend to obsess about and over think the situation.

The Walk Over
I am overly cautious while walking to, and entering the bathroom. I realize this stems from my own paranoid (which you will read about later) but I believe it to be with other people's best interest in mind. On my way over to the bathroom, I always listen closely to see if I can hear someone in the bathroom before I go in. If I can, I will turn around and walk the other way. Why? Well what if someone is coming out of the bathroom, after finishing #2, right as I walk in? What if it smells bad? What if it's my boss? I don't want the person leaving the bathroom to be embarrassed by the vile stench they have created, so I will just walk away and avoid the situation all together. I know they may not even be going to the bathroom (maybe they are just washing their hands or blowing their nose) but I would rather not risk their embarrassment.

If I don't hear anything on the approach, I will proceed to step two, and slowly apply pressure to the handle to see if it is locked. If it is, I will have touched it so gently, the person on the inside will not have been alerted to my presence, and can continue uninterrupted. If it is unlocked, I will slowly open it, while averting my eyes, just in case there is someone on the inside who has forgotten to lock the door. I open the door slowly to allow time for someone to frantically yell "Ah there's someone in here!" and I avert my eyes because I think that seeing a co-worker dropping a deuce would be a tremendously awkward and traumatizing experience for the both of us.

The Prep
First of all, in one of my more OCD tendencies, I must wash my hands BEFORE I use the restroom, as well as after I am finished. I do this to ensure nothing that is on my hand transfers to my p-ner, and nothing from my weenis transfers to my hands (and in turn my eyes, ears, nose, or mouth). Secondly, and I don't care that this is a waste of water, I will not be able to sit down if there is ANYTHING in the toilet (one square of toilet paper stuck to the side, soap bubbles, crap crumbs...it doesn't matter) so if there is something there, I will have to flush it first. I can't really explain it, but it's kind of a routine.

The Act
When I use the restroom for anything other than a quick trip, I need to scrub and dry the area with toilet paper or paper towels (even if it's already dry). On some occasions, Clorox Disinfecting Wipes (I prefer the lemon scented) are needed to prep the zone, but this is reserved for places I feel are the most unclean. After I have adequately sanitized the commode (including the area at the base of the toilet where men tend to drip urine) I am ready for the task at hand. While taking care of business, I check and recheck the lock on the door for fear that someone will magically be able to open the door and accidentally walk in on me. Then, as if a locked door wasn't security enough, I will set my foot in front of the door to stop it from swinging open in case someone tries to push their way in through. Whatever, I know it doesn't make sense.

So, as I said, I will use public restrooms, but because of all of that, it is a rare occasion.

Vacuuming!

When people think ocd, they think repetitive hand washing, nonsensical flipping of light switches, and peculiar cleanliness. I haven't slipped into the first two yet [yet] but my passion and my pleasure is cleaning, particularly vacuuming. I Vacuums! I love the look, the feel, the smell of the room after a vacuum has finished, and, of course, the spotless area left in its wake.

I have a rule when it comes to vacuums, You get what you pay for. Plain and simple. It has been my experience that people hesitate to spend a lot of money on a vacuum. I have been told "The $30 one is just as good," on several occasions, but that's just not the case. Sorry. Not only is the suction weaker, but the vacuum will lose that weak suction over time, and you will be left with a plastic canister, reminiscent of a child's play thing. FYI, those toys don't actually clean.

My favorite type of Vacuum, is the Dyson. Hands down, the best vacuum I have ever used. They make as much noise as every other vacuum, but they are far more powerful and simply glorious. I have two Dyson vacuums in my home. The first one, for everyday, quick and easy use, is the handheld Dyson DC 16 root 6. This one is great. It docks easily in the charger so it is always ready to use, and it has the same great Cyclone technology that makes Dyson one of the premiere vacuum companies in the world. Quick, convenient, and amazing.

The Second one in my house, is the Dyson DC 14. This is an upright vacuum with a long, telescoping handle for tough corners. The hose can extend up to 17 feet without losing any suction, and is great for going up stairs and getting cob webs out of ceiling corners. The base of the vacuum is so strong, you can feel the dirt and grime being sucked out of every crevice in your home. Freakin' great!

Now I realize that they are expensive, but if taken care of properly, you will never have to buy another vacuum. Luckily, Dyson is a brand carried at Bed, Bath, and Beyond, who routinely send out 20% off coupons, which can be applied to the purchase of your first and last vacuum. You can sign up for Bed, Bath, and Beyond 20% off coupons here.