License Plates

"It has been so long since you posted!"

Shut up.

Here are the top four things I hate about license plates. Why four? Because I can't think of five.

4. Leaving the previous year's registration sticker on your license plate when the new sticker comes in from the DMV. The instructions that come with the new registration clearly tell you to take the old one off and place the new one on. The problem is, they are a pain in the ass to get off because they are made to fall apart when someone tries to take them off, to stop unsavory characters from stealing the sticker from someone else's plate. Because of this, people get lazy and leave the old one on. This annoys me, and with minimal effort, it can be avoided. See how bad it looks? (Also, sometimes people purposely leave a little bit of the previous year's sticker showing to make a rainbow. This is also stupid but too similar for it to be its own complaint.) 

3.  Putting the "Peel Here" sticker on your plate as a decoration. There really isn't much to say about this one. It's not a decoration, it's trash. You wouldn't display the envelope a Christmas card came in next to the Christmas card itself. It's trash! Throw it away! (For those of you who don't know what I'm talking about, see below.)

2. No license plate frame. This is really my weird thing, but license plates without a decorative frame just look bad. To take this one step further, I hate the dealer frames too. If you don't take those things off, you are advertising for the dealer for free. Why would you do that? For just a few dollars, you can get a generic one that nicely frames your plate. It's the same logic behind getting a picture frame for your family photo...it just looks better.

And now, the #1 most annoying thing that has to do with my obsession with [all things unimportant] license plates...

1.  Switching the placement of the month and year stickers. This is another one of those "I'm too cool to follow the rules" things that I hate. I honesty believe that it is impossible to do this on accident, so it has to be on purpose. When you get a new, never used license plate, there is a blank spot on either side of the word California with "MO" on the left side where the month sticker is to go, and "YR" on the right side where the yearly registration is supposed to go. It's clear as day and yet some people switch the placement for some reason unbeknownst to me. This irritates me to no end when I see this.   

Toliet Paper - Revisited

Way back in July 2009, I wrote a post on toilet paper, and how it should only be placed on the holder with the loose end "rolling over" the roll. Well, Cottonelle has come up with the "Roll Poll" to gather data on this very issue.

The Results (so far):

I am pleased to report that approximately 75% of the country got it right, while the other 25% are living in the dark and letting their toilet paper roll under. If this was a test, America would have a "C" which is less than desirable. But if this was an election, the Over Party would have an overwhelming majority, and would be running the joint. (How great would it be if this was a real poll and the majority voters elected which way toilet paper HAD to be put on? BTW, I'm pretty sure there are dumber laws than that in existence.)

Unfortunately, the state I live in, California, is voting 63% to 37% to roll under. Really CA? Screw you. How could so many people be off? It's almost the exact opposite of the rest of the country. I just don't understand and I am thoroughly disappointed.

 

Happy New Year

No, I'm not wishing you a happy new year. I'm not sure what that really means. Happy Birthday, I understand. It's one day. You can brush off your problems for a day. You can ignore things that normally bother you for one day. But a year? Come on. It's either going to be a good year, or it wont.

Anyway, that's not my point. My point is, if you are going to tell someone "Happy New Year," make sure you say just that. I can't even count how many times I got "Happy New Years"-ed this year. Afterwards I thought to myself, "Are you serious? How many years should I be celebrating right now?" Obviously that confusion comes from New Year's Eve, which is not the plural of year, but rather, possessive, as in "the eve belonging to the New Year." But that doesn't matter. Just because I know where the error comes from doesn't make it more tolerable.

While I'm on the topic, I thought I would let you know, it's only appropriate to tell someone "Happy New Year" after the new year begins. From 12/28 on, I got the crap happy new yeared out of me. And not even with the semi-redeeming "And in case I don't see you" in front of it. Just straight "Happy New Year" like I was living a week in the past or something. And what can I say to them? I refuse to say it back that early, so I would just say "Yep" or "Thanks" in response.

But now it's January 6th, so let me take this time to tell everyone I hope you have a good enough 2010.